What do you do when there is nothing to do? Call it free time, down time, unstructured time or something else; it can become the “devil’s playground” if it is not managed properly. Down time with nothing to think about or do and boredom are potential gateways to relapse for addicts, especially when preceded by stress. TC students must learn how to manage this time in a positive way. They must take control of free time rather than it taking control of them. Is this an important part of discipleship? Absolutely, yes!
As a director, I discovered that unstructured free time was often when many students would leave or be tempted to leave. Some centers attempt to deal with this by giving the students little to no free time. In the initial phases of the program this may serve the students well, but is it doing them justice in the long run? Are students prepared to deal with free time and boredom they will face once they are on their own? A well-balanced discipleship ministry should provide training and tools to equip students to face down time with confidence.
Is there one simple answer for every student? No! Every student is special and has their own individual personality and interests. However, there are guiding principles that we can teach our students.
- Teach the students about the potential for relapse when they have down time or are bored. Just making them aware of the potential is the first step. Currently, the GSNL class Growing Through Failure includes a chapter on dealing with boredom.
- Don’t wait for free time and then try to figure out what to do. Plan. What down times are the most tempting? Plan several days ahead of time what you will do with that time. Write it down. It can change, that’s ok, but at least you have a plan. It doesn’t have to be productive. Even planning to relax, read or play games is healthy. Plan.
- What is the greatest commandment? Love God and Love others! Several years ago I personally went through a phase of boredom and depression. While praying about it, the Lord confronted me with the greatest commandment, love God and love others. Instead of feeling sorry for myself I was challenged to find ways to express my love for God and others in a real and tangible way. Worship, service, befriending, etc. This took the focus off of myself and put it where it really belongs. I believe this is one of the most biblically wise things we can teach our students in helping them deal with free time and boredom.
- Develop long term goals for yourself and plan out small steps to help you begin to accomplish those goals that you can do during your off time. Plan specifically which step you will work on during your next down time or day off.
- Develop a new hobby such as, gardening, woodworking, running, etc.
- Make a list of activities to refer to when you are not sure what to do. Add to it as you think of other things. They can be productive, fun or relaxing: wash the car, clean out the garage, go fishing with a friend, serve at a local community outreach, etc.
- Involve healthy relationships in your time off, activities and hobbies. List what friends you will hang around or call. Plan which ones you won’t!
- Ask yourself some important questions: Does what I am planning to do on my free time exhibit Christian character and wisdom? Is it healthy and constructive for me?
- Knowing how to manage down time without the use of chemical substances or destructive relationships is a key point of discipleship for our students.
Think about it –
- What can we do to train our students to manage their free time in a positive and productive way?
