When I was a kid my uncles would smoke and drink and tell me to never do it. Other people told me to never lie, and then I would hear them lie. Lives lived in this way were not congruent.
Congruent is defined as:
1. In agreement or harmony.
2. Of Geometry – identical in form; coinciding exactly when superimposed.
I hated Geometry, but I loved Algebra. Ok, so I was weird. That was a long time ago, and I don’t remember any of it now. But I do remember that two parallel lines are congruent. So, when you draw two lines that run identically side-by-side they are congruent. Suppose those lines represent your stated values and beliefs – one line represents what you believe and tell other people are your values and the other line represents your actual day to day behavior – the way you live your life. Are those two lines congruent? Or, do they look more like a heart graph line on a monitor?
We all have values even if we have never written them down. In fact, our TRUE values are not what we write down and say our values are but are rather what we actually do. Our values are the way we live our lives. Period.
One author says it this way: “What I believe is not what I say I believe. What I believe is what I do.” or as the old saying goes, “Actions speak louder than words.”
We can teach, correct and reprimand our students but what do they see flowing from our lives? Are our own actions congruent with what they are hearing from our mouths? If our actions aren’t congruent with the values we verbalize, we have lost credibility and thus our ability to speak into their lives with authority and influence them for the Kingdom. Modeling our faith is foundational to effective discipleship.
“And you should imitate me, just as I imitate Christ.” 1 Corinthians 11:1
“Little children, let us not love in word or talk but in deed and in truth.” 1 John 3:18
“Who is wise and understanding among you? By his good conduct let him show his works in the meekness of wisdom.” James 3:13
Discuss – Evaluate – Execute:
- What are your values – really?
- Set aside time for reflection in your prayer time. Prayerfully ask God to show you, “Did my behaviors align with what I believe, value and teach?”